When a marriage or relationship gets into trouble, one of the first things that happens is that the two people begin to lose their emotional connection. Communication becomes stressful and difficult. Each begins to question why they are in the marriage. As result, what connection there is can be quite negative. The relationship becomes all about trying to solve the problems in it. It can become filled with blame, anger and resentment.
However, to save a marriage, it's important to do the things that make your relationship fun, interesting and exciting. These are the things that you probably did early on in your time together, but have stopped doing. And one of these is to 'lighten up' and have some humor.
In fact, one of the best ways to create good feeling between you and your spouse is to introduce some humour. Put another way, make your spouse laugh! Too often, sharing a funny story or joke is one of the first things that goes from a relationship when problems start to happen. Yet it was one of those things that made your relationship fun and relaxed in the early days, wasn’t it?
If your relationship or marriage is under stress, make a point of sharing a laugh with your partner. If they are cold or resistant towards you, you can still share something funny with them. Just make sure you do it in a casual way. Say to yourself, “I’m going to share this with them because I think it’s funny. If they don’t react positively then it’s no big deal.”
One of the keys to saving your marriage – especially when your spouse doesn’t want to – is to bring some fun back into your relationship, without creating any additional pressure on your spouse. Humour is a great way to do it!
To get the ball rolling, here’s a funny poem you can pass on to your spouse. Email it, text it or even speak it your spouse. They’re bound to enjoy it!
Note: This poem is a bit risqué. If you can add a bit of adult spice to the fun you share with your spouse, all the better. Just don’t overdo it, at least not to start with. Keep it casual!
The missus bought a Paperback,
down Shepton Mallet way,
I had a look inside her bag;
… T’was “Fifty Shades of Grey”.
Well I just left her to it,
And at ten I went to bed.
An hour later she appeared;
The sight filled me with dread…
In her left she held a rope;
And in her right a whip!
She threw them down upon the floor,
And then began to strip.
Well fifty years or so ago;
I might have had a peek;
But Mabel hasn’t weathered well;
She’s eighty four next week!!
Watching Mabel bump and grind;
Could not have been much grimmer.
And things then went from bad to worse;
She toppled off her Zimmer!
She struggled back upon her feet;
A couple minutes later;
She put her teeth back in and said
I am a dominator !!
Now if you knew our Mabel,
You’d see just why I spluttered,
I’d spent two months in traction
For the last complaint I’d uttered.
She stood there nude and naked
Bent forward just a bit
I went to hold her, sensual like
and stood on her left t*t!
Mabel screamed, her teeth shot out;
My god what had I done!?
She moaned and groaned then shouted out:
“Step on the other one”!!
Well readers, I can’t tell no more;
About what occurred that day.
Suffice to say my jet black hair,
Turned fifty shades of grey.
By John Summers
(reprinted by permission from the author)
Liam Naden is a marriage and relationships coach, specialising in helping couples save their marriage from divorce. He is the author of more than 20 books on marriage including the best-seller "How to Save Your Marriage - When Your Spouse Doesn't Want To."
For more help with saving your marriage visit Liam's website http://liamnaden.com
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