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Articles from Oliver JR Cooper | Selfgrowth.com
- Relationships: Why Are Some People Obsessed With Other People's Problems? - by Submitted on Apr 23, 2015 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone only focused on themselves and didn’t take the time to see how other people are, there is a strong chance that they will be seen as self-absorbed. Not only that, they might not have many friends either. This is going to cause them to feel isolated from others, and their existence ...
Views: 4772 - Controlling Mothers: Why Are Some Mothers Controlling? - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperIt could be said that to some degree all mothers are controlling and that they have to be. From the very beginning a child has to have the right discipline and guidance to develop. However, what happens when this control is taken to the extreme and the child is taken advantage of? A ...
Views: 4771(1 vote) - Success: Does Success Depend On Who You Know Or What You Know? - by Submitted on Mar 23, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperIn the modern day world, education is seen as an important part of becoming successful and as a means of increasing ones quality of life. And so getting the right qualifications or the right training for instance is therefore imperative when it comes to making progress. This sounds logical ...
Views: 4718 - Judgemental: Why Are Some People So Judgemental? - by Submitted on Apr 27, 2015 from Oliver JR CooperTo be judgmental is part of life and it is something that everyone does to some degree or another. There will be some instances where this is seen as good thing and other times when this will be seen as bad or inappropriate. If one was to see an athlete or sports star cheat or break certain ...
Views: 4697 - Communication: Is It Important To Respect Other People's Personal Space? - by Submitted on Mar 31, 2015 from Oliver JR CooperDuring those moments when one is in a crowded place, it is not going to be possible for them to maintain their personal space. The space that they need in order to feel comfortable is not going to exist. This could be something that one experiences everyday or it could be something that ...
Views: 4691 - Mother Enmeshed Men: Why Don’t Some Men Break Away From Their Mothers? - by Submitted on Jan 11, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperFor many years, men have been seen as being one way and women as being another way. And part of this related to men being the ones who were independent and the women as being dependent. So a man would be an example of the masculine on the outside and on the inside and a women’s outer femininity ...
Views: 4639 - Social Media: Can Social Media Stop Us From Living In The Moment? - by Submitted on Jan 18, 2015 from Oliver JR CooperWhile one’s attention can be in the moment, it can also go into the past and focus on the future. This is something that is likely to take place for most people on the planet and it could also be described as normal. At times, one will want to reflect on the past to remind them of something ...
Views: 4557 - Neediness: Is Your Neediness Pushing People Away? - by Submitted on Jun 13, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperWhile having needs is part of being human, there is a big difference between having needs and being ‘needy’. When it comes to ones needs, one is going to be aware of what they are and then go about getting them met. And at times they will be met and at times they won’t be. So in this case, ...
Views: 4467 - The Life Of Pi: My Interpretation Of The Metaphors - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperWhen I first saw the trailer to this film I thought it looked like the kind of film that is rarely made. Ang Lee came up as the director, and it appeared to be the ultimate adventure. After seeing the trailer I soon forgot about the film until I decided to go the cinema and it was showing. My ...
Views: 4456 - Relationships: Why Do Some People Attract People Who Are Needy? - by Submitted on Nov 15, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperWhen it comes to dynamics in relationships that cause problems and a fair amount of frustration, there are two common patterns of behaviour. One of those is when one is attracted to people who are unavailable. So they desire to be another person and yet continually end up being attracted to ...
Views: 4445 - Emotionally Undeveloped: Why Are Some People Emotionally Undeveloped? - by Submitted on May 17, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperNot every part of a human being develops at the same rate, and this is to be expected. If one was to look at nature and see how a tree grows, they will soon see that the branches are not all the same length. Some are longer than others and at the same time, it hasn’t affected the tree. It is ...
Views: 4394 - Relationships: Why Do Some Men Feel Powerless With Women? - by Submitted on Jun 17, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperIt is a human need to feel a sense of power; with the most important power of all said to be based around having a sense of personal power. This is more of an inner power, where one is generally in control of themselves, as opposed to being in control of others. And when it comes to the area ...
Views: 4393 - Self Love: Why Is It So Hard To Accept Ourselves? - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperI would firstly like to point out that the love I am talking about here is not narcissistic or egotistic. What I am referring to is an acceptance of who we are; our true nature, free from the ideas and perceptions of who we are or should be. This is of course one of the hardest things in ...
Views: 4389 - Being Enough: Why Do Some People Not Feel Good Enough? - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperThis is something that can come under many names, from self esteem, to self worth, self belief and confidence. And no matter what words are used, what it ultimately comes down to is the feeling or sense of being enough. Here one feels that who they are is enough, and this relates to who they ...
Views: 4307 - Psychological Boundaries: The Ability To Say Yes And No - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperThe term boundaries can seem unclear and even confusing at times. What does the term ‘boundaries’ mean? And how does it relate to psychological wellbeing? Are they the same as ‘walls’? And in this context what are walls? What I am describing here are psychological boundaries. So here I will ...
Views: 4300 - Deceit: Why Are Some People Easily Deceived? - by Submitted on Dec 19, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperThere are some people who believe just about everything that another person says. And then there are others who go to the other extreme, who question and doubt everything they hear. With other people having a balance between the two; so they don’t believe everything that comes out of other ...
Views: 4290 - Defence Mechanism: Escapism - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperThis is another of the defence mechanism that all of the others could be said to come under. Any one of the myriad of Defence mechanism comes under the purpose of escaping our current sense of dissonance, with the aim of removing the uncertainty and into a more familiar (safer) place, regardless ...
Views: 4286 - Relationships: Do Actions Speak Louder Than Words? - by Submitted on Feb 03, 2015 from Oliver JR CooperIt is often said that ‘Actions speak louder than words’ and while this saying has been around for a very long time, it doesn’t mean that this advice is always followed. At times, it can be difficult to pay attention to anything but the words that are being spoken. When this happens, what ...
Views: 4274 - Happiness: Why Do Some People Believe That They Don't Deserve To Be Happy? - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2015 from Oliver JR CooperWhat makes one person happy is not necessarily going to be the same as what makes another person happy, but while their requirements may be different, they both have the need to be happy. This is something that most people on the planet want to experience; with their being many ways in which one ...
Views: 4254 - Toxic Shame: What Is Toxic Shame? - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperThere is said to be two types of shame. One is described as normal and healthy and the other is said to be abnormal and dysfunctional. Healthy Shame This shame is part of having a healthy conscience; with certain behaviours and actions being kept in check by this feeling. And when ones ...
Views: 4224(2 votes) - The Heart: Why Do Some People Close Their Heart? - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperWhen it comes to relationships with other human beings and with life itself; the heart has a unique purpose. At an emotional level; the left side (feminine) of the heart allows one to receive and the right side (masculine) of the heart allows one to give. And when one of these sides is out of ...
Views: 4164 - Relationships: How Should Someone Respond When Another Person Is Indifferent? - by Submitted on Oct 16, 2016 from Oliver JR CooperWhile one can be friends with people who put in as much effort as they do, there is also the chance that this isn’t the case. It could then be said that some of their relationships will be out of balance. And not only might this apply to their friends, it could also be something that they ...
Views: 4133(1 vote) - Blame: Why Do Some People Always Blame Others? - by Submitted on Sep 21, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperFor change to take place and progress to be made, there needs to an element of responsibility. And this applies to all areas of one’s life; without it, something might stay as it is or simply get a lot worse. But while this is evident, it doesn’t mean that someone will take responsibility ...
Views: 4108 - Relationships: Why Do Some People Try To Change Others? - by Submitted on May 11, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperChange is part of life and cannot be avoided and yet that doesn’t mean that it’s an easy thing to embrace. There are many others ways that can be sought as a way to avoid change. One of those ways is to try and change other people. This is something that probably comes under the umbrella of ...
Views: 4069 - Attention Seeking Behaviour: Can Childhood Neglect Cause Attention Seeking Behaviour? - by Submitted on May 28, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperTo be seen and recognised is something that most human beings want to experience. And while this is part of being human and nothing to feel ashamed of, these needs are going to vary from person to person. For some people, receiving a moderate amount of attention will be enough to enhance ...
Views: 4054 - Defense Mechanism: Dissociation - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperDissociation is the result of trauma we have experienced in our life. And by dissociating from the intensity of the trauma, we can minimize the suffering caused. With these experiences being subjective in nature and usually extremely overwhelming for the individual, they may however seem ...
Views: 4041 - Relationships: Why Are Some Women Emotionally Unavailable? - by Submitted on Aug 19, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperIt’s not uncommon to hear that women want to settle down and that men want to ‘play the field’. And based on this, women want to be in a relationship and men are not bothered about being in one. This is how men and women are generally portrayed and in some cases, this is going to be true. ...
Views: 3995 - Emotional Expression: Why Don't Some People Express How They Feel? - by Submitted on Aug 18, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperWhile there are some people who express how they feel, there are other people who don’t. And when one is not only in touch with how they feel but expresses how they feel, they’re going to experience life differently to someone who doesn’t. This is because emotions are important and not ...
Views: 3985 - Obsession: Is Obsession A Bad Thing? - by Submitted on May 10, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperThe words addiction and obsession can appear to describe the same thing. And yet there is a clear distinction between the two. An obsession is something that is usually in the mind and can relate to people, things and ideas; so all that is abstract and all that is concrete. On the other hand, ...
Views: 3985 - Being Exposed: Why Do Some People Have A Fear Of Being Exposed? - by Submitted on Jul 24, 2016 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough some people feel comfortable with themselves, there are others who experience life differently. And it could be said that one will achieve more when they feel comfortable in their own skin, so to speak. Based on this, if one doesn’t feel comfortable with themselves, it will then ...
Views: 3977(1 vote) - Boundaries: Why Do Some People Let Others Walk All Over Them? - by Submitted on Aug 05, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperTo walk all over a carpet or some kind of tiled floor would be normal. This is because the floor has no feelings and very few wants and needs for example. If the floor was used too much it may wear out; so it will need to be cleaned at certain times and it might even need to be replaced after a ...
Views: 3976 - Relationships: Can Our Past Relationships Affect Our Present Relationship? - by Submitted on Jan 06, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperOne can enter a new relationship with the idea that it will be a completely new experience and unlike what they have gone through in the past. But while this might be their outlook in the beginning, this can soon come to an end as the relationship progresses. This could be because of what is ...
Views: 3972 - Relationships: Why Do Some Women Sabotage Healthy Relationships with Men? - by Submitted on Aug 28, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperWhile a woman can say to herself and others that she wants to be in a relationship with a man who is healthy and functional, it doesn’t mean that she will be attracted to a man who is like this. This can relate to woman who can’t seem to attract a guy that is healthy and for women who do attract ...
Views: 3969 - Emotional Support: Is Emotional Support Important? - by Submitted on Jul 24, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperIt is often said that human beings are either independent or dependent and while it can look this way, ultimately we are all interdependent. No one is their own island and each one of us is reliant on others in some way. This is not to say that everyone has this outlook: Some people can ...
Views: 3967 - Boundaries: Why Do Some People Have No Boundaries? - by Submitted on Aug 23, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperTo be human means to be vulnerable and so it is incredibly important that we look after ourselves and don’t allow people to compromise who we are. Physically we are vulnerable and this also applies to our mental and emotional sides. Each one of these needs to be looked after and protected from ...
Views: 3964(1 vote) - Mother Enmeshed Men: Do Some Men Stay Attached To Their Mothers Out Of Loyalty? - by Submitted on Nov 06, 2015 from Oliver JR CooperWhile some men are able to break away from their mothers, there are other men who are unable to do this. When this doesn’t take place, not only is it going to cause the men to suffer; it is also going to cause the women in their life to suffer. However, if a man has turned his back on women ...
Views: 3937 - Communication: Are Manners Important? - by Submitted on Apr 06, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperIn the past manners were often drilled into children by their parents and then by teachers and as one grew into an adult; it would then have typically become a habit to have manners and the need to be reminded would not be as necessary. However, in the modern day world this process doesn’t ...
Views: 3928 - Relationships: Why Do Some Breakups Hurt Men More Than Women? - by Submitted on Feb 24, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperIn recent studies, men have been shown to suffer more than women when a relationship comes to an end. And while some people would not have been surprised to hear this, for others, it was unexpected and even dismissed. Even though men have emotions just like women, this doesn’t always appear ...
Views: 3914 - Anger: Why Do Some People Have Anger Problems? - by Submitted on Aug 15, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperThere are numerous challenges in the world today and some of these challenges are to do with emotions; from depression, to suicide and a whole myriad of other things. And emotions cannot simply be ignored or dismissed. They deserve and need as much attention as ones diet or physical health. ...
Views: 3850 - Boundaries: Why Do Some People Fear Setting Boundaries? - by Submitted on May 04, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperIn order to protect ones personal space and what they own, it will be important for them to set boundaries. Other people are not always going to know what ones boundaries are; if people could reads minds, it would be different. At times, other people will know what is appropriate and what is ...
Views: 3814 - Social Media: Does Social Media Encourage Cheating? - by Submitted on May 31, 2015 from Oliver JR CooperIf a woman has been with men who have cheated, she might come to the conclusion that all men are the same. And if a man has been with a number of women who have cheated, he could also come to the same conclusion. As a result of what they have been through, it would be normal for them to say ...
Views: 3761 - Abused Children: Why Do Abused Children Deny What Happened? - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough the title refers to abused children, this article will primarily look at why some adults, who were abused as children, grow up to deny what happened to them. Individuals that were abused in their childhood by their parents or caregivers often find it hard to look at and admit to what ...
Views: 3750 - Boundaries: Who Do Some People Feel Responsible For Other People's Feelings? - by Submitted on Jan 08, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperTo be responsible for how one feels is one thing and yet it is quite another to feel responsible for how other people feel. Owning how one feels and not to see other people as being the primary reason that they feel as they do, is a sign of self awareness and emotional maturity. Through ...
Views: 3731 - Grief: What Can Happen When Someone Has Grief Trapped In Their Body? - by Submitted on Mar 10, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperAfter one has certain experiences in their life, they are generally going to feel certain emotions. And as we are all emotional beings, this is normal and what is to be expected. But just because this is normal and part of being human, it doesn’t mean that this is what always takes place. ...
Views: 3711 - Relationships: Do Some People Reject Others To Avoid Being Rejected? - by Submitted on Jul 05, 2015 from Oliver JR CooperNo matter what someone looks like or where they have come from, they will have experienced rejection. What this comes down to is that it is part of life and this is because it is not possible for one to always be accepted. And if one was to look back on their life, they would also realise ...
Views: 3709 - Objectification: Why Do Some People Objectify Others? - by Submitted on May 15, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperTo objectify someone is often described as what happens when they are seen as an object. And when this takes a place, they are not seen as a human being who has feelings or their own cognitions for example, they are just a physical body. Here another person may well be seen as an object that ...
Views: 3699 - Relationships: Why Do Some People It Find It Hard To Receive Love? - by Submitted on Apr 15, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperLove is something we not only want to receive from others; it is something we need to receive. And while love can mean different things to different people, the love that I am talking about here relates to: affection, kindness, support, validation, touch and compassion. This can be something ...
Views: 3678 - Relationships: Why Are Some Women Attracted To Abusive Men? - by Submitted on Jun 10, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperFor some women out there, it can seem as though they have a sign on their forehead that says ‘’abusive men only’’. And this is due to their experience of only attracting men who are abusive. It may even go further than this and a woman could come to the conclusion that all men are the same. ...
Views: 3666 - Unmet Childhood Needs: Is It Important To Grieve Unmet Childhood Needs? - by Submitted on Feb 11, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperWhen one was a child, they had certain needs and wants. And for some people, these would have been met in the majority of cases. This doesn’t mean that one would have needed to have had a caregiver that was always available. As it is unlikely that this would have been possible and not only that, ...
Views: 3662 - Isolation: Can Toxic Shame Cause Someone To Isolate Themselves? - by Submitted on Dec 31, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperAristotle once said that human beings are social animals and although this was said many, many years ago, it may as well have been said yesterday. Some of the environments that humans live in are different to how they were in the past, but this hasn’t changed the fact that humans need each ...
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