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Articles from Nicola Beer | Selfgrowth.com
- 5 Steps to Overcome Divorce & Separation Anxiety - by Submitted on Jul 15, 2015 from Nicola BeerFear of an uncertain future can stop us from doing great things, and it can keep us holding onto things and habits that are hurting us. Today I will share 5 steps to deal with separation and divorce anxiety. I think it is fair to say, that the majority of us from time to time wonder what the ...
Views: 2435(1 vote) - Helping Your Spouse Heal From Your Affair - by Submitted on Apr 05, 2016 from Nicola BeerMost unfaithful partners underestimate the damage and fallout after infidelity. Many claim that they didn’t think of the consequences and often, when faced with losing what they have, panic. This panic can lead them to make further mistakes in their attempts to help their injured partner. If ...
Views: 1813(1 vote) - If You Think an Ultimatum is Your Only Option… Think Again! Marriage Advice - by Submitted on Nov 03, 2016 from Nicola BeerAre you sick and tired of your spouse’s behaviour? Do you have no more to give? Are you at the end of your tether? Do you think an ultimatum is your only way out? We hear people giving ultimatums every day. “If you don’t stop doing X then Y will be the consequence.” However, more often than ...
Views: 1533(2 votes) - Relationship Advice - How to Keep Marital Satisfaction High After Children - by Submitted on Nov 03, 2016 from Nicola BeerThe effects of having a child are immeasurable. Whilst most parents say the greatest moment and thing in their life was the birth of their son or daughter. The effect that having a child can have on your marriage is immense. Marital dissatisfaction can ensue after having a child and it can ...
Views: 1232(2 votes) - Are you Spending Enough Time Together? Relationship Counseling Advice - by Submitted on Sep 20, 2016 from Nicola BeerTime can be a big source of conflict in relationships. When you get married “your time” also becomes “their time” and if you have children then you need to also schedule in “family time” and time for family chores. Many couples I speak to are feeling so busy and stressed by feeling pulled ...
Views: 3972(1 vote) - Did I Marry the Wrong Person? Marriage Problems & Marriage Advice - by Submitted on Nov 10, 2016 from Nicola BeerWhen people get to the stage of seeking help for the dissatisfaction or conflict in their marriage, they often wonder “Did I marry the wrong person?” or “Did I marry right or well?” These are common thoughts many share with me that they struggle with. So, how do you know if you have? Is there ...
Views: 1464(1 vote) - Rebuilding After Affairs - by Submitted on Apr 05, 2016 from Nicola BeerSince working with individuals over the years to heal from infidelity and marriages with multiple wives, I have learnt what successful re-builders do compared to those unsuccessful in repairing their relationships after affairs. Whilst there is no denying that affairs can destroy love, ...
Views: 1348(1 vote) - Remember Michael Jackson's Hit Man in the Mirror? - by Submitted on Nov 21, 2016 from Nicola BeerCHANGE YOUR WAYS TO CHANGE YOUR RELATIONSHIP If there were any lyrics that best describes today’s message it would be from Michael Jackson’s 1987 hit song ‘Man in the Mirror’ “I’m starting with the man in the mirror. I’m asking him to change his ways and no message could have been any clearer ...
Views: 1365(1 vote) - Tips to Getting Through Rough Patches in Your Relationship - by Submitted on Nov 28, 2016 from Nicola BeerOne of the biggest issues that couples face is that after the first few blissful months or years together we begin to see our partner’s flaws, the things we don’t like and the things that upset us and annoy us. When we initially fall in love it is with the feeling it gives us. We feel on top of ...
Views: 1378 - 3 Reasons & Ways To Stop Bickering In Your Relationship - by Submitted on Dec 04, 2017 from Nicola BeerMany couples bicker over all sorts of trivial things. Especially when they have become more disconnected, this is where ridiculous arguments, over pointless things can become big issues. For example I’ve heard couples bicker about the “right” way to pack the dishwasher, whether a colour is red ...
Views: 1515 - 3 Steps To Handling Divorce Threats or “I’m Not “In Love” With You” - by Submitted on Oct 10, 2017 from Nicola BeerMost people are aware now of the 40-50% average divorce rate in the west and expat communities. Knowing this doesn’t make that any easier if you are living in an unhappy marriage where divorce threats have been made. The good news is an unhappy relationship doesn’t mean it’s over. That’s ...
Views: 1436 - 3 Steps to Handling Rejection in Intimate Relationships - by Submitted on Oct 30, 2017 from Nicola BeerRejection is painful no matter where it comes from, but it is especially hurtful when it comes from your partner… The one that knows you the most and is meant to love ALL of you deeply. Rejection is one of the hardest feelings to experience because it often plays on your mind non-stop, like ...
Views: 1347 - 4 Keys to Staying Connected in Your Relationship – Part 1 - by Submitted on Mar 19, 2017 from Nicola Beer“Marriage isn’t just about raising kids, splitting chores and making love. It can also have a spiritual dimension that has to do with creating an inner life together — a culture rich with rituals, and an appreciation for your roles and goals that link you…” Gottman, 7 Principals of Making a ...
Views: 1469 - 4 Ways to Get and Stay Close to Your Partner - by Submitted on Mar 27, 2017 from Nicola BeerDo you feel like you are drifting along in your marriage? Do you lack excitement or fulfilment in your relationship? Do you sometimes wonder why you are still married? As mentioned last week there are four elements that help build and support a shared meaning, all of which should be ...
Views: 1486 - 5 Keys to Overcome Tension & Save Your Marriage - by Submitted on May 08, 2017 from Nicola BeerWHERE THERE’S A WILL THERE’S A WAY How to get past the problems you’re having and make it work The key to strengthening and improving any relationship, especially those that are struggling is honesty. What are you really feeling inside? What do you really want and need? What do you want and ...
Views: 1365 - 7 steps to help your husband/wife heal after an affair - by Submitted on Jun 28, 2017 from Nicola BeerIf you have had a marital affair, your husband/ wife has found out and you want to save the marriage, there are some key steps you will want to follow. How you react in the first few hours to 3 months matters as this is the “trauma stage” in the healing process. If you want to keep your ...
Views: 1498 - 7 Steps to Keep Your Hobbies and Marriage Intact - Save Your Marriage - by Submitted on Sep 14, 2016 from Nicola BeerIan and Kim were a couple who came for marriage counseling, as they were constantly fighting over Kim's love of fashion and the financial cost of her shopping sprees, her husband Ian couldn't keep up with it and thought that there were far more important things to be spending money on. Kim felt ...
Views: 1809 - 7 Tips to Stop Work From Harming Your Marriage - by Submitted on Jan 04, 2017 from Nicola BeerIn the current market, long working work hours and high levels of stress seems to be the norm rather than the exception. It used to be entrepreneurs and executives running round fire fighting and answering emails 24/7, now most of my expat friends and clients are doing the same. There is no ...
Views: 1483 - 7 Ways to Stop Money Arguments From Destroying Your Relationship - by Submitted on Jul 03, 2017 from Nicola BeerMoney arguments and problems are one the most significant factors that can lead to divorce according to numerous studies. Research by Kansas State University found that this is because money arguments decrease relationship satisfaction and are harder to move on from than other marriage ...
Views: 1314 - 7 Ways To Stop Work Stress From Ruining Your Marriage - Marriage Counseling Advice - by Submitted on Sep 16, 2016 from Nicola BeerThere is no doubt that work stress has become an increasing factor in marital dissatisfaction. Today couples work on average a thousand more hours each year than people did thirty years ago. This number tends to increase further in expat cities, as well as if you are an entrepreneur. All the ...
Views: 1471 - 9 Things To Do When You Feel Like Giving Up On Your Marriage: - by Submitted on Sep 27, 2017 from Nicola BeerWe all can probably remember a time in our lives where we have felt like giving up. Where we have felt exhausted, drained, alone and hopeless. I remember feeling so low at times that I could not see the point in trying or fighting anymore. Whether in the setup phases of my business many years ...
Views: 1522 - All Paths Lead To Love – No Matter Where You Are Right Now - by Submitted on Aug 14, 2017 from Nicola BeerThere are two paths we can follow to get to love: Love and Non-love They both take us in the end to LOVE This may make perfect sense to you or you may be thinking what on earth am I writing about today. Let me elaborate. Throughout the course of my life (I am sure like most ...
Views: 1290 - All Paths Lead To Love – No Matter Where You Are Right Now - by Submitted on Aug 14, 2017 from Nicola BeerThere are two paths we can follow to get to love: Love and Non-love They both take us in the end to LOVE This may make perfect sense to you or you may be thinking what on earth am I writing about today. Let me elaborate. Throughout the course of my life (I am sure like most ...
Views: 1202 - Are You Giving or Receiving Too Much in Your Relationship? - by Submitted on May 30, 2017 from Nicola BeerA Balancing Act – The Importance of Receiving Love and Giving Love It’s better to give than to receive is a phrase that is used far too often and often without any explanation. It is definitely good to give but it’s not necessarily better. What’s important is that we have a balance between ...
Views: 1442 - Being Blamed In Your Relationship? How To Stop The Blame Game - by Submitted on Nov 19, 2017 from Nicola BeerHow to effectively respond to blame and enhance your marriage. Blame in any relationship is challenging to deal with, even more so in marriage. Your natural instinct may be to blame back. All this does is create more tension. Husbands and wife’s that blame each other for their unhappiness, ...
Views: 1651 - Broken Trust – 7 Keys to Rebuilding Trust In Your Marriage - by Submitted on Mar 05, 2017 from Nicola BeerTrust is an essential key in any relationship. I’ve helped couples rebuild trust after an affair, financial dishonesty, physical and emotional abuse as well as constant lying over small things. I’ve also worked with individuals to trust again after previous childhood trauma or relationship pain ...
Views: 1972 - Can You Save A Marriage After Separation? Or is it the End? - by Submitted on Dec 05, 2017 from Nicola BeerThe most common questions I get asked are: How can you save a marriage after separation? Or how can I get my husband or wife to reconsider a separation? Or My husband/ wife is insisting on a separation, what can I do? These are important questions as it is a critical time if you want to ...
Views: 1387 - Couple Therapy - 5 Secrets to Protecting Yourself From Your Spouses Negativity - by Submitted on Sep 14, 2016 from Nicola Beer"Nicola, my husband is chronically complaining and forever in a bad mood. He manages to find something wrong with everything and is constantly feeling hard done by and down. I don’t know how to help him or live with him at times! I don’t want him to ruin the holidays for me and the children ...
Views: 1314 - Couples Therapy - How to Deal with Your Spouses Annoying Habits - by Submitted on Sep 16, 2016 from Nicola BeerWhat are your spouse's most annoying habits? Is it the way they talk, eat, sit, clean up or snore when they sleep? Do they perhaps hum an annoying tune or crack their knuckles? And when was the last time they did something that irritated you? Last week? Yesterday? An hour ago? One of the most ...
Views: 1639 - Divorced Parents - What Do You Do When Your Child Doesnt Want to See You or Your Ex? - by Submitted on Apr 28, 2015 from Nicola BeerLet’s face it co-parenting after divorce isn’t easy. Many children of divorce go through a roller-coaster of emotions like their parents do when the family splits. Children may isolate. Have angry outbursts. Refuse to eat. Cry. Say horrible things. Throw tantrums. But what do you do if they ...
Views: 1535 - Do You Ever Think How Can I Change My Spouse? - by Submitted on Apr 28, 2015 from Nicola BeerYou wouldn’t believe the amount of husbands and wives that come up to me and say “Nicola, how do I get my Spouse to Change? ”If you are trying to save your marriage by desperately attempting to change your partner to no avail - STOP! Want your partner to exercise more? Stop social media? ...
Views: 990 - Do You Have A Shared Meaning For Your Marriage? Happy Marriages Do! - by Submitted on Apr 05, 2016 from Nicola Beer“Marriage isn’t just about raising kids, splitting chores, and making love. It can also have a spiritual dimension that has to do with creating an inner life together — a culture rich with rituals, and an appreciation for your roles and goals that link you..." according to Gottmans 40 years of ...
Views: 1435 - Do You Have A Shared Meaning For Your Marriage? Happy Marriages Do! - by Submitted on Apr 05, 2016 from Nicola Beer“Marriage isn’t just about raising kids, splitting chores, and making love. It can also have a spiritual dimension that has to do with creating an inner life together — a culture rich with rituals, and an appreciation for your roles and goals that link you..." according to Gottmans 40 years of ...
Views: 1564 - Do You Have Each Other’s Back? 6 Tips To Make Your Marriage More Loving… - by Submitted on Dec 13, 2017 from Nicola BeerDo you and your partner have each other’s back or are you operating more in a mode of attack? We wouldn’t be human if we did not experience times in our lives that challenged us. It’s natural that certain events, people and our own behaviour will trigger fear, anger, stress, jealousy, ...
Views: 1364 - Do You LOVE or HATE New Year Resolutions? - by Submitted on Dec 30, 2016 from Nicola BeerI tend to find like marmite, garlic or someone packing your bags at the supermarket, people either love or hate the concept of making new year’s resolutions. Working with hundreds of people through relationship issues, there is often one in a couple one who loves to plan, organise and ...
Views: 1439 - Drop Neediness and Become More Attractive In Your Relationship - by Submitted on Jul 31, 2017 from Nicola BeerOvercome the top 5 signs of being too needy, give your partner space and increase your attractiveness! Neediness will kill the passion and attraction in your relationship. We all want to be cherished and desired in our relationship that makes us feel good but being needed and pampering to a ...
Views: 1640 - Feeling Guilty about ending your Marriage? Secret Tips to Let Go of Guilt - by Submitted on Apr 28, 2015 from Nicola BeerGuilt is a painful, uncomfortable and often lingering emotion that many individuals I work with suffer from. You will learn about John and Dana’s experience today, and at the end are my 3 secret tips to letting go of guilt. Take John’s case, after many years of endless agonizing and ...
Views: 8238 - Feeling Lonely? 4 Steps to Leave Loneliness for Good - by Submitted on Feb 05, 2017 from Nicola BeerFeeling Lonely? 4 Steps to Leave Loneliness For Good Today I felt compelled to pour my heart out to you and talk about a subject that I care so deeply about and that’s loneliness. You don’t need to be single to be lonely. In fact, there are literally thousands of husbands and wives who feel ...
Views: 1574 - Financial Abuse: Is Your Husband / Wife Financially Controlling? - by Submitted on Apr 23, 2017 from Nicola BeerFinancial Abuse – Relationship Advice for a Financially Controlling Husband / Wife: Financial conflict causes a great deal of unhappiness and tension in relationships. I received this email last week and they have given me permission to share it, here is the advice I gave Emily (name changed) ...
Views: 1692 - First Impressions Matter in Dating. First INTERACTIONS Matter in Marriage! The Key To Happiness - by Submitted on Sep 11, 2017 from Nicola BeerWe have all heard time and time again in the home, at school and in the work place that first impressions count. Whether that’s our mothers trying to get us to polish our shoes, wear something we don’t like or advice given for a job interview. Having helped saved thousands of marriages now, ...
Views: 1102 - First Impressions Matter in Dating. First INTERACTIONS Matter in Marriage! The Key To Happiness - by Submitted on Sep 11, 2017 from Nicola BeerWe have all heard time and time again in the home, at school and in the work place that first impressions count. Whether that’s our mothers trying to get us to polish our shoes, wear something we don’t like or advice given for a job interview. Having helped saved thousands of marriages now, ...
Views: 1133 - Focus on Love and Resolve Your Marriage Problems Quickly - by Submitted on Sep 05, 2017 from Nicola BeerLove is a wonderful feeling. Self-love brings peace and acceptance, love for others and being loved brings feelings of gratitude and happiness. So today I am going to cover the 3 easiest ways to bring more of it into your life and relationships. I have developed several tools that have been ...
Views: 1286 - Get the Happiness & Love You Deserve In 2017! - by Submitted on Dec 12, 2016 from Nicola BeerStart today by taking these 3 steps… Save My Marriage Program – An Alternative to Marriage Counseling With the new year approaching, most of us start to think about what we want to change next year. Look for a new job, join a gym, eat healthier, take a new course, save money or sign up for ...
Views: 1447 - Grieving the End of the Marriage – 4 Steps to Begin Healing - by Submitted on Apr 28, 2015 from Nicola BeerDivorce is a word that we see and hear everywhere. In our daily lives divorce attorneys solicit their services in commercials, billboards, print media and flyers. Television shows and films trivialize divorce as it's cloaked in steamy affairs, romanticized depictions of fragmented families and ...
Views: 3299 - Help! My Spouse is Driving Me Mad – 6 Steps to Deal with Annoying Habits - by Submitted on Apr 28, 2015 from Nicola BeerWhat’s are your spouse’s most annoying habits? Is it the way they talk, eat, sit, clean up? Do they perhaps hum an annoying tune or crack their knuckles? When was the last time they did something that irritated you? Last week? Yesterday? An hour ago? One of the most annoying things about ...
Views: 1609 - HOLIDAY GIFT – Create A New Beginning - by Submitted on Dec 18, 2017 from Nicola BeerWith Christmas & New Year ahead of us with all the rejoicing it is the time to let go of all old unnecessary strings to find peace, serenity and start the new year fresh and make it a great success. It can bring up a lot of pain and stress this time of year. So I have a very special gift… If ...
Views: 1239 - How long does it take to heal after an affair? The stages of healing after an affair – By Nicola Beer - by Submitted on Oct 02, 2017 from Nicola BeerHaving worked with 100’s of couples now looking to repair the relationship or heal themselves after an affair, most want to know how long does it take to heal and what are the stages of healing after an affair. Like when dealing with a significant loss, loss of a loved one, financial loss or ...
Views: 1573 - How long does it take to heal after an affair? The stages of healing after an affair – By Nicola Beer - by Submitted on Oct 02, 2017 from Nicola BeerHaving worked with 100’s of couples now looking to repair the relationship or heal themselves after an affair, most want to know how long does it take to heal and what are the stages of healing after an affair. Like when dealing with a significant loss, loss of a loved one, financial loss or ...
Views: 1856 - How Not Forgiving Your Partner or Ex, Harms You! - by Submitted on Jul 15, 2015 from Nicola BeerAre you struggling to forgive your ex or current partner for something they did? Are you still carrying a grudge, feel resentment or anger towards them? In all romantic relationships (past and present) there will be times where the one you love will hurt you. It could be something small, ...
Views: 1867 - How to Change the 5 Negative Thought Patterns that Lead to Divorce... and Transform Your Marriage - by Submitted on Sep 16, 2016 from Nicola BeerAfter the honeymoon period in a relationship is over, and our partner raises complaints about us, or does things we don't agree with or is somehow absent, we often start to make or draw slightly negative conclusions about them or the relationship. Typically it starts off as a thought one day, ...
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