Self Improvement Site
On The Internet! Take the Self Improvement Tour
On The Internet! Take the Self Improvement Tour
Articles from Bobbi Palmer | Selfgrowth.com
- ***Why Online Dating Is Not for You - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerLast week I hosted a workshop called Get Online, Get Noticed, Get Dates, Exclusively for Women over Forty. I had a fantastic time with these smart and lovely women who really want to meet their mate. It was a total blast, and they all left excited and feeling like they had the confidence and ...
Views: 1309(20 votes) - ***When You Should Treat a Man Like a Woman - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerAre you an independent, smart single woman who is dating and looking for love? If so, you've likely been challenged with how to respond when a man does something that ticks you off. What are realistic expectations? What should you tolerate? I get asked this question in many forms. It can be ...
Views: 2149(6 votes) - ***One Thing That Makes Anthony a Little Less of a Weiner - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerHave you heard about Weinergate? Just in case you haven't, it goes like this: Congressman Anthony Weiner, after denying it for days, got caught quite literally with his pants down. (Yeah, I know I'm not the first to use that. But it works.) Apparently The Weiner has been acting like a horny ...
Views: 1054(9 votes) - ***Imperfection Does Not Equal Rejection - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerAre you perfect? Do you know anyone who is? Look at the people you know, especially those in midlife or older. Do you know anyone who hasn't had some rough times behind them or who are not currently facing life challenges? It’s doubtful, because this is real life; not the movies. Those of us ...
Views: 1583(2 votes) - 30 Things You Can Do This Weekend (With or Without a Man) - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerHappy Memorial Day weekend! How about a little trivia to start your day? In 1868, May 30 was designated as a holiday to honor the nation’s Civil War casualties. Now called Memorial Day, it was originally known as Decoration Day. Red poppies are commonly associated with Memorial Day and are ...
Views: 2441(11 votes) - ***30 Things You Can Do This Weekend (With or Without a Man) - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerHappy Memorial Day weekend! How about a little trivia to start your day? In 1868, May 30th was designated as a holiday to honor the nation’s Civil War casualties. Now called Memorial Day, it was originally known as Decoration Day. Red poppies are commonly associated with Memorial Day and are ...
Views: 2150(12 votes) - ***Two Lessons that Single Women Over 40 Can Learn from Oprah - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerI hate being like everyone else, but I have to make an exception for Oprah. Everyone is talking about her, and rightly so. May 25 is her final show. Oprah will no longer be visiting us every weekday, teaching us, nourishing our spirits and making us laugh. The positive transformation this ...
Views: 2050(12 votes) - ***How Your Dating Can Help Your Daughters - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerIf you're a Mom with children still at home, I'm sure you have concerns about how your dating might affect your kids’ lives. Issues such as jealousy and challenges with time-sharing are real. But I’d like you to consider the positives. Yes, it’s true that "a happy Mother is a good Mother." ...
Views: 2282(2 votes) - ***Why Women over 40 Should Be Picky Daters…Kind of - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi Palmer"I know why you aren't married: you're just too picky!" Women who are single in their 40s, 50s and beyond hear this a lot. After all, what other reason can there be for why you haven't yet snagged a man? As a woman who became a first-time bride at 47, I heard this a lot—especially from my ...
Views: 2765(8 votes) - ***The Truth about Dating, Single Men and Strong, Independent Women - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerAre you a single woman over 40 who is smart, independent and thinking there are no good men out there? I hope you don’t mind my saying this: you are wrong. As a dating and relationship coach – and a woman who was a first‑time bride at 47 – I’m quite aware of what we tell ourselves: Men ...
Views: 4569(5 votes) - ***Why Married Men Adore You But the Single Guys Don't - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerAs a Dating and Relationship Coach for Women, I talk to many women who say they are buddies with many married and attached men; yet they don't get asked out on any dates. The complaint comes under one of these two categories: 1. She talks to a lot of men and they seem to like her; but none ...
Views: 2769(4 votes) - ***Let's Agree to Face Our Fear - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerDo you go month to month, year to year, repeating the same mantra about men? It leaves your mouth in various forms, but you’ve got only one point: to release yourself from any responsibility and keep you safe and snug-as-a-bug-in-a-rug without the worry of that pesky intimacy thing. "There ...
Views: 1561(6 votes) - ***How to Turn Fear of Dating into Fun Dates - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerWhen you think of dating – especially online dating – do you feel any fear? Do you get even a tiny twinge of terror? If your answer is "yes," you are not alone. In fact, I think you're among the majority. The women I'm coaching often tell me about situations they describe as "scary." Here ...
Views: 1884 - ***Four Ways to Flirt with Flair and Class - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerNo matter your age, the way to connect with a man in the "I think you're hot and would be interested in going out with you" way is to flirt. When I suggest that to the over-40 women in my dating workshops and coaching programs, I can see them cringe. Most of these otherwise outgoing women ...
Views: 2178(4 votes) - ***Ten Tips to Kick-Start Positive Change - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerAll right, ladies. I trust we all got through Valentine’s Day, right? But let's make this your last February fourteenth when you don’t have a fab date! To do that, you’re going to have to make some changes. Put simply, stagnation is never good. When you refuse to change or embrace new ...
Views: 1632 - ***Valentine's Day: Make It All about YOU! - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerHave you been dreading it and trying to avoid it? Chances are pretty good – thanks to all the advertising and silliness – that you’re keenly aware Valentine’s Day is right around the corner. I used to call Valentine's Day “Singles Awareness Day.” Now that I'm married I couldn't care less ...
Views: 1596(11 votes) - ***Dating? (Exactly) What to Say to Men in Difficult Situations - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerIn dating, good communication is the key to meeting and attracting men…especially the right men. It's also the key to developing and maintaining fulfilling relationships. One of the most important ways I support my coaching clients (www.datelikeagrownup.com/coaching) is by helping them ...
Views: 2173 - ***How to Spot the Bad Guys and Chase Them Away - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerDo you want to be in a relationship with a man who doesn't care what you want and need? I'm going to assume the answer is "no." So I have to ask: Why would you date a man who doesn't care what you want and need? Two of my private coaching clients are struggling with the notion of ...
Views: 1819(5 votes) - ***8 Ways to Prevent Turning to Mush around Single Men - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerI've heard the same thing from so many women this week that I had to ask you if this sounds familiar: "I'm generally a very friendly, confident gal...unless I'm in the company of a single man—especially one I'm attracted to. In that case I turn into mush." Why is it that when we meet or ...
Views: 2300 - ***Dating Over 40: Why He's Not Asking You Out (Part 2) - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerContinuing from yesterday, it's important to make yourself memorable when you are dating. There are tons of women out there; you want to be the one he wants to know. When you follow this advice and get your story out in the right way, the guys who are good matches will take notice. They are ...
Views: 2451 - ***Dating Over 40: Why He’s Not Asking You Out (Part 1) - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerI can answer this in three words: You’re not memorable. That’s it. Whether it’s the hot man you had a nice chat with at the local coffee shop or the guy you had a great first date with, getting him to ask you out can take some skill. Yep, I said skill. You’re not 18 anymore, and the ...
Views: 2295 - ***How to Get Dates with Smart, Confident Men - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerI've been told that I'm scary. That's what my client, Liz, told me today. She says that several men have said she's intimidating and "too much for them." I was told that when I was single and dating. My response was: that's who I am—and if you can't take it, I don't want you! (I probably ...
Views: 4427(26 votes) - ***Why You're Still Single - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerOne of my clients recently said, “I don’t think there’s something wrong with me; I just think I’m doing something wrong.” Bingo. The majority of women who come to me for help with dating and relationships lack confidence. Most are sure something is wrong with them. What else would explain ...
Views: 1610(2 votes) - ***How to Write a Killer Email and Get Dates Online - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerWant to know the number one trick to meeting men online and getting dates? Learn how to write a killer email. When I was online, I remember how it felt. I’d send an endless number of emails that seemed to go into the pit of Internet rejection hell. The truth is, there is a lot of ...
Views: 2345(3 votes) - ***Make Your List, But Consider It Twice (Or Thrice!) - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerCan you use a dating pick-me-up? Something to boost your hope of finding your fabulous life partner? If you’re wondering if dating and the nonsense that sometimes comes with it is worth it, read on. I have a spectacular success story to share, along with advice on two simple things that will ...
Views: 1103(1 vote) - ***Dating and Looking for Love? Why You Should Think of Yourself First - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerDo you know that you are special, that you count big time, and that you deserve to think of yourself first when dating and developing a love relationship? This is such a difficult concept for so many women. Think of myself first? That’s so selfish! I’ve never done that before…ever! I don’t ...
Views: 2301(12 votes) - ***Given a Chance, How Men Can Surprise You! - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerAre you resisting letting men help you or do nice things for you? Maybe you’re thinking it threatens your independence or makes you seem weak. Or maybe you’re just trying to be low-maintenance; thinking that this is what men want. As I’ve said time and time again, letting a man do for you – ...
Views: 1667(4 votes) - ***One Thing You Can Stop Doing to Improve Your Dates and Relationships - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerRaise your hand if you can accurately read the minds of your girlfriends. My guess is that, at least for a few, you actually can. Larry and I can read each other’s minds at times. When you’ve spent about 2000 days with someone you love, that happens. (It’s not always a good thing, btw.) Now, ...
Views: 1759(4 votes) - ***3 Ways to Manage Rejection So You Can Move On - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerRejection sucks. There’s no other way to say it. When he doesn’t show interest, doesn’t show up, or breaks it off after a relationship develops; it’s ugly and icky. No doubt about it. Thing is: rejection doesn’t have to strike a mortal blow. I know so many women who avoid connecting with ...
Views: 4946(5 votes) - ***Should I Waste My Time Meeting or Dating an “Imperfect” Guy? - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi Palmer30 minutes. That’s about how long you generally have to “get to know” a man before deciding to have a cup of coffee or date with him. You meet online, or at the local bank, and that’s about it. But he seems imperfect. He’s clearly missing one of your must-haves. Should you gracefully decline? ...
Views: 2308(4 votes) - ***5 Tips to Help You Stick to Dating, Even When It Sucks - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerYesterday I wanted to quit. This is too hard. There are days things seem to be clicking and I’m finally getting it…marching boldly toward my goal. Then there are days like yesterday when I feel clueless…like a failure with no hope of success. And I can’t help but take it personally. I know I ...
Views: 2022(5 votes) - ***The 10 Style Secrets of Hip, Healthy & Sexy Women Over 40 - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerDo you walk out of the house each day feeling good about yourself, and ready to run into that one man who is going to rock your world an put that proverbial cherry on your cake? Check out this guest post by Sybil Henry, The Style Concierge. Sybil joined me Wednesday night for my GGNO Club ...
Views: 3008(6 votes) - ***What Are Your Dating and Relationship Rules - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerHave you ever asked yourself this question: What are my rules for dating and relationships? What are my boundaries, what must I do, and what must I have? And what will I simply not tolerate in myself or in others? Too often I talk to women who stayed in unfulfilling relationships or have a ...
Views: 1432(4 votes) - ***Why It Can Be a Good Thing When He Goes Cave-bound - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerLast week a smart, thoughtful woman left a comment on my post about Dating the Somewhat Disappearing Man. These are the guys I call “pingers” because they ping you (or contact you) just often enough to make sure you’re there when they need or want you. They keep you attached and interested, and ...
Views: 4093(4 votes) - ***When Do Men Expect to Have Sex With Us? A Single Man's Response - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerI get asked this question constantly. Women who are dating want to know this; especially women who are divorced and over 40, and haven’t been dating for some time. They also want to know how they can tell if sex is all he wants. Good questions. The truth is that whether you’re dating at 20, ...
Views: 3547(6 votes) - ***Are You What's Holding You Back from Finding Love? - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerWhy do we hold on to the man who isn’t good for us, our feelings of insecurity and being less-than, or our pattern of picking jerks and liars? These are all self-sabotaging behaviors and beliefs, and intellectually we know it. Yet we cling on for dear life, feeling powerless over our unfortunate ...
Views: 2263(12 votes) - ***Dating Tip: First Decide Whether You Like Him - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerIt’s pathetic how easily I can find my self acting like the insecure kid I was in high school. These days it doesn’t come up too much, but can happen when I meet someone I especially like and admire, and get the sense they don’t return the feeling. I can get to feeling so hurt and undeserving ...
Views: 2091(8 votes) - ***Why You're Dating and Not Finding Quality Men - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerDating can be a real pain in the butt, right? It can be a lot of work that leads to a lot of nothing. I conducted a survey recently and asked women what their biggest challenge was when they date. The #1 response was: I’m not meeting quality men. Can you relate?? I hear this from women ...
Views: 2794(5 votes) - ***Online Dating: How to Get Started and Make it Work - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerAs if dating and mating wasn’t hard enough, technology has added a variety of new challenges to the art of hooking up. Not only do you have to master the computer crud, you have to figure out how to actually connect with another human being amidst the volume and the anonymity. Being a ...
Views: 2403(4 votes) - ***Please Be Kind to Frogs - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerThink about the clever line we women often use: it takes some form of “I’ve kissed so many frogs I’ve got the warts to prove it!” or “How many frogs do I have to kiss before I find my prince?” You know what I’m talking about. It’s cute, and although we don’t really laugh at it, it tends to ...
Views: 2145(10 votes) - ***How You Can Help Men Make You Happy - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerIf you don’t ask…you don’t get. I think this is the key to being happy with men. It’s one of my Dad’s favorite lines. I heard it so often growing up that it’s now a mantra in my already overloaded brain. Dad’s premise was that it is your responsibility to state what you want, and then give ...
Views: 1729(11 votes) - ***The Secret to Being a Happy Dater - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerWhy is it that when we date — even at 40, 50, or 60 — we can become an alien woman from planet WTF? If you’re anything like I was, it’s sometimes difficult to recognize yourself when you’re in the presence of a hot, nice, or simply available man. The beliefs and habits of our 25 or 30 year ...
Views: 2117(3 votes) - ***Do You Actually Know When You're Being Rejected? - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerRejection can be a very good thing. Until you find the man who brings you the love and joy you deserve, you should thank the men who reject you. These men are doing you a favor. I think they know – consciously or not – that they won’t be able to give you what you need; and they know it before ...
Views: 2291(1 vote) - ***The Truth About Reading Men’s Minds – And Quieting Yours - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerIf you’re a woman who tends to over think and over analyze (and let’s face it…what woman doesn’t?) I want to advise you when it’s appropriate to do so about men: N-E-V-E-R! Oh how we love to dwell in conversations with ourselves about all kinds of fascinating things. Is he attracted to me, ...
Views: 2718(10 votes) - ***How to Know if He is Merely Hot...or Maybe Husband - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerLooking for a life partner but keep picking players, paupers, or just plain zeros? Finding a partner is like finding a good job: you only need one, but making a bad choice wastes your time and sticks you in an unpleasant situation. To avoid that, you need to make a grown-up decision about ...
Views: 2174(14 votes) - ***10 Simple Things to Do to Improve Your Search for Love - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerHave you heard this quote by Anthony Robbins: “If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always gotten.” I love this quote. What does it have to do with dating and your search for love? It may have everything to do with it…especially if you’ve been looking for a meaningful ...
Views: 2414(13 votes) - ***Should You Trust Your Instincts? Beats Me. - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi Palmer“Intuition is truly a feminine quality, but women should not mistake rash conclusions for this gift.”~Minna Antrim The other day I was listening to my friend tell me about her 25 minute “date” with this guy “who had nothing going for him.” As she’s talking I’m thinking: WTF?! So I ask her ...
Views: 4403(9 votes) - ***Albert Einstein...a Relationship Expert? - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerAlbert Einstein once said: “Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed.” Al was so damn smart! Not only was he the king of quantum physics, he got right to the heart of one of the most troubling challenges in ...
Views: 2388(13 votes) - ***Be a Woman Who Knows That She is Enough - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerYour fear of being rejected because you are imperfect is exactly what is getting you rejected. Yah…I know I’ve written about this a million times, but two recent experiences reminded me of how major this is. So here I am reminding you in case you still don’t get it. Me…Popular? My Junior ...
Views: 1458(6 votes) - ***5 Must-Know Tips for Boomer Women Dating Online - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerDating sites report that their fastest growing segment are people over 50. My clients, women ranging from 35 – 65, are having great success with it. Face it: online dating is the new hot spot for people who wouldn’t dream of meeting someone in a bar. You know I’m a huge proponent of online ...
Views: 1393(1 vote)