Ultimate Manifesting Experiment

I’m totally exposing myself, as I’m posting about my biggest desire. It is the one thing, I dearly wish the Universe to deliver to me.

I started focusing on this goal in February 2010, as it seems like it is the key to take me to the next level in the aligning with my authentic self. My wish, which I seed out into the Universe, is to have a three day a week job in my present field, where I earn the same salary as I do now. I have asked for the opportunity for this to happen by March 31, 2010.

Why do I want this goal? Having a job which allows me to work three days a week in my present field, would allow me the time to align more with my authentic self and explore work that is authentically “me”. Aligning with “me” in my work would allow me to fully utilize all of my talents and help others. Having more time would also help me fully enjoy other priorities in my life right now, like my children and helping my husband with his business ventures.

I was conflicted about posting my goal. Openly posting my goal to the big wide world involves some scary risks for me. If it didn’t come to pass, I would be disappointed. There is also the risk that readers may think I’m a failure at manifesting. My biggest fear though, is that I am afraid if I put all my faith in the Universe to deliver this to me, and it doesn’t happen, then I will also lose faith in the Universe too.

However, after thinking about it, I decided to post it for three reasons.

1) I decided it would dedicate me even more greatly to my goal.

2) The thing my most authentic self desires at the present, is work that is in alignment with who I really am.

3) I decided that if I could find the courage to put my goal out there, that you might be inspired to as well.

In order for my goal to come to me, I had to come to the place where I could believe it could happen for me. At first I didn’t believe it could. The reason I didn’t believe it could, was because I had many fears that were preventing me from reaching it. To allow my goal to reach me, I had to face my fears and work through them one by one.

I wrote down my fears, examined them and reasoned my way through them.

1) I’m afraid that if this doesn’t happen, that I will lose my faith in the Universe as being abundant. Will I? I already have so much abundance in my life (love, friends, health, kids, etc.) that there is no way I could not think that the Universe is an incredibly abundant place for me.

2) I’m afraid if it doesn’t happen, I will lose my mind if I have to stay at my present job. Will I? No, I’m doing this job now and I’m surviving, even if it’s not the life I would prefer, and I know I can do it.

3) I’m afraid if it doesn’t happen I will be a manifesting failure. Will I? If don’t manifest my job in one month, I will likely be a lot closer to manifesting it. I might then achieve it in 2 months or 4 months, but in any event, I’ll likely be a lot closer to making it happen.

4) I’m afraid that if it doesn’t happen and my blog readers know that it didn’t happen that they will seriously consider anything I write about manifesting. Won’t they? Maybe I’ll learn something about manifesting from my experience, readers could learn from.

5) I’m afraid that a 3 day a week job doesn’t exist. Doesn’t it? I know the following people in my field who have jobs that are: a 3 day a week job, a 4 day a week job, and a 30 hour flexible work week. These are all real jobs in the real world, so there is no reason I couldn’t have one too.

6) I’m afraid no one will pay me the amount I need to help sustain my family’s expenses. Won’t they? The people I know in the jobs in my field are already making more money than I require. So it does happen, it is already out there.

7) I’ll miss my co-workers too much. Will I really? Realistically, while I talk to them every day, I wouldn’t want that affection to keep me from progressing with my life. I go for lunch with them maybe once a month, which I could still do that if I wasn’t working here.

Along with dispatching my fears, I’m:

a) focusing on this vision being more “real” than reality.

Every day I take ½ hour to feel in my body and emotions as if this situation were true. I write about how I would feel and how I could serve with my talents. This doesn’t mean that sometimes I don’t worry that it won’t happen. I do worry about it sometimes. When that happens I try to bring myself back from worrying about it to focusing on it, and feeling it in my emotions and in my body, as my “real” reality.

b) taking “guided action” towards my goal.

If an action occurs to me that would take me forward towards my goals (without feeling like I’m acting in desperation), then I do it. Sometimes I worry that I’m not doing enough. Then I bring myself back to just feeling good about the goal again, and know that I am doing enough.

So I’m putting it all on the line, in front of everyone!! I’ve moved from scared to excited about this experiment.