Lies: Telling Things That Are Not True

Each of us has different standards regarding telling the truth vs. telling a lie. I’d like to share with you some ideas about why telling the truth might be a lot easier on you. Shakespeare said “Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive.” That is a very meaty statement so let’s examine this topic about truth vs. lies.

Why do people lie? Telling a lie is a form of self-protection that some of us adopt when we are children. Telling a lie is a way of never having to confront. Telling a lie can be a form of sales or marketing. Some lie to cover up their true age. Lies are a form of trying to hide what you do not know. I think lies are often an attempt to hide the fact that you don’t feel good about yourself or what you are doing. Lying is an effort to avoid being ridiculed. It’s an attempt to sublimate your fears.

What does telling a lie do to you? Each one of us has an internal monitoring system called a conscience. Our conscience tells us in a very subtle way when we are off the norm. It makes us feel uncomfortable. Lying makes us feel uncomfortable. Cheating makes us feel uncomfortable. Some of us try to anesthetize this uncomfortable feeling by pushing it down deep inside; by numbing it with liquor or drugs; or by trying to avoid it. None of these side-steps works, because the uncomfortable feeling never goes away until we right ourselves. If you make a habit of lying, other infractions (like cheating) soon follow.

A lie builds upon itself. When you tell one lie, then you have to tell another one on top of it to cover for the first lie. Then you tell a third lie to cover up the second one. It can get very complicated – Shakespeare’s tangled web. So a lie builds upon itself, but what it builds is not a very pretty picture.

What is the effect of lying? Lies cause divorce, war, broken business and personal relationships, the distrust of your parents, teachers and friends, and plants the seeds for more infractions. If you are a habitual liar, you can receive public scorn, as President Clinton did when he repudiated Monica Lewinsky. Some liars become cocky or arrogant. When one of these is caught in a lie, he becomes livid with rage or revengeful. If you have the habit of lying, you will attract other liars into your life experience; your success will be transitory; you’ll be seen as foolish; you’ll be punished equal to the level of your lies; you’ll constantly be looking over your shoulder wondering if someone will catch you in your lie. On a business level, without trust, all our systems would implode.

Telling the truth is so much easier. If we are to be trusted or relied on, our word must be seen as reliable. We have to walk the same talk that comes out of our mouths. If we tell the truth and we live the truth, we also receive wonderful effects: trust, other honest people in our experience, comfort and satisfaction, and greater success because the foundation of who we are and how we live is solid and supportive. Our relationships are more successful when they are built on truth.

Here are some quotations about the truth.

" A man who lies to himself, and believes his own lies, becomes unable to recognize truth, either in himself or in anyone else, and he ends up losing respect for himself as well as for others. When he has no respect for anyone, he can no longer love and, in order to divert himself, having no love in him he yields to his impulses, indulges in the lowest forms of pleasure, and behaves in the end like an animal, in satisfying his vices. And it all comes from lying- lying to others and to yourself." ~Dostoyevsky, The Brothers Karamazov

“I am speaking the truth in Christ. I am not lying; my conscience bears me witness in the Holy Spirit. “ ~St Paul, Romans 9.1

“Have you considered if he gives the lie to the truth and turns (his) back? Does he not know that Allah does see?” ~Koran, The Clot, 96:13,14

The truth is advised by all. If you want to Be the Change, you need to be an honest person. It is much easier than lying.