I decided to write this article due to the high number of comments I get from my daily readers. Some of them have been saying things like “I am tired staying with him, he does not deserve my love, I need a breakup” etc. My inbox is almost full with things like that and I am already getting worn-out.
This is one of the reasons I decided to tackle this problem in the form of an article which could be read by anyone at any time. This article is in no way encouraging breakups but giving tips on how to deal with an abusive partner when it's certain that the relationship can't continue right?
Relationship is supposed to be some kind of joy and happiness between two or more people who have some common interest. Although relationship was meant to be successful, still at times, there’re certain things that can hinder it from succeeding. Although we have to try our best, still nature has the upper hand. While these things are bound to exist in almost every relationship, some people managed to survive it and other failed the result to breakup. So it’s a 50-50 thing.
One of the worse things about a partner
There many reasons that can lead someone into breakup for example, a person may go deep into his relationship before knowing that his partner was a flirt. In some cases, he may know this when the relationship must have gone too far. In this case, there’s nothing as too far. What I do not agree here is the fact that there’s no such thing in relationship to be considered as too far when it’s certain that things are not working.
For example, what if you discovered that your partner is a flirt? What if you noticed later that he/she is not productive? What if you guys are not in good terms with each other? As you can see, they’ll be no such thing in these situations other than getting yourself another soul mate.
Don’t get me wrong! I am not in support of breakup still, I am totally against the fact that you shouldn’t try to straighten your relationship anyway you can, but when it’s certain that the abusive partner or the relationship is unbearable, there is no psychological method of it other than getting a breakup. You can’t be right for living with someone who doesn’t appreciate or show concern as you do. Is just like trying to go somewhere, which you’ll never arrive the end.
This is because one spouse can’t keep a relationship going just alone. He/she must need the help of the other partner in other to succeed. Now, what if the other partner is not always there to play his own part? There’s nothing other than giving a break if he/she can’t change rather than being under pressure for the rest of your days on earth.
How to break an abusive partner
Breaking up has never been easy with many people but based on the following methods, you can still do it successfully without appearing to be cruel. These methods are backed by deep psychology and proven to be true and they will act as some kind of support in breaking an abusive partner or the relationship.
The first is taking your right: Most abusers will take their partners' right and especially their source of income so that they will be dependent on them for almost everything. By obtaining a job for yourself, you will be indirectly programming his subconscious mind that if he continues or does not change you will break up with him. So this step acts in two ways. The first way is like an indirect warning to his subconscious mind and the second being that you’re now independent and can breakup if he/she doesn’t adjust.
Associate with those you want: Such people won't allow you to participate in social gatherings or visit friends and relatives. It's not normal when you’re aware of this and suppress it. Being conscious of it is already the energy to fight back. This is nothing more than exposing your mind on your likes and dislikes. What happens if he would not listen? Then start inviting your friends and close ones home. This aspect simply means that you can define right from wrong and this will serve as some kind of threat to him.
What are they saying? When a boy and a girl start dating, at that point is just between them but when they marriage, it now involves both families. Therefore, what are they saying about your marriage or the relationship? In what way are they showing concern? Talk to the members of yours and if they oppose the relationship, then they is nothing you can do alone without their support other than breakup. In this situation, you can just go ahead and pull the trigger.
From what mentioned above, breaking up with an abusive partner is not all about singing a song of “breakup breakup” ups and downs without any sign of seriousness or threat. This is because abusive people have a certain path in which they reason. Their biggest fear is threat its self rather than your repeated phrases. In order to do this, you can first start by seizing your rights, creating signs of threat and making a way out. By this way, they’ll feel it.
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